I go to hospital tomorrow morning.  Op is about 11am and lasts around one to one and a half hours.  I’m having it done with a spinal block rather than general anaesthetic because I don’t want to have to deal with any more ‘poorliness’ than is absolutely necessary.

So I’ll have a new hip in place by tomorrow lunchtime.  Apparently they make you  stand up and get walking straight away so that’ll be interesting.  People say the pain from the arthritic hip goes immediately, replaced by the post-operative pain, which gets better!!  That’ll do me.

The op is happening at Chapel Allerton Hospital, which is a centre of excellence and a great place.  The pic below shows the bespoke kit they gave me at ‘Hip School’.

So, I’ve got things in place for the 6-week healing period, when there is a risk of dislocation, which are covered by the Hip Precautions- no bending hip and thigh more than 90 degrees and no twisting of the new joint- so special chairs and toilet seat, loose clothes that are easy to get on and off etc, etc…

I’m hoping to be home by the weekend and determined to use this as an opportunity to look after myself and get well.  The past few months have been hard- only being able to walk shorter and shorter distances, low energy because of pain and a general discouragement from being active.  A bit depressing, especially since the past year has been very busy and emotionally challenging (family life mostly- its highs and lows).

I want also to spend less time on screen.  I think my insomnia, physical inactivity, and the unsettling state of the world this last year or so has meant that I’ve got a bit addicted to what my friend Carla calls the ‘sacred oblong’, the bloody phone that’s always there! This is definitely not a good thing.  It’s as if it’s become my personal shock trooper for peddling the Spectacle, that display of meaningless, commodified chatter that serves to distract us from our own thoughts, from being agents of our own destiny, and being part of real, unmediated community.  Damn those algorithms!

So I will be rationing time spent looking at it.  One session a day to check important things, then I might even turn it off.  I want to open up my attention span for reading, listening, jigsaw-puzzle solving, meditating, just being.  Resting.

I’m feeling very emotional this past week, often tearful.  Maybe, because I am facing being vulnerable for a while, I am having to open my heart.  I am grateful for this.

I don’t think I’ll want visitors in hospital.  Pete will be the best person to deal with me being grumpy and demanding!  After that I’ll let people know if there’s anything I want from my dear friends.  Lots of offers already.  For which I am grateful and which make me want to cry again!!